Virtual Potty Humor

(actual online chat with my 10 year old)

Me: Hi!!!!!!!!

Him: p{}{}p

Potty humor, part 2

(exiting the bathroom, appearing very satisfied with himself . . .)

"Well, I'll tell you ONE thing . . . our plumbing sure can take a punch!"

Potty humor

(sitting in my home office, working away, when the phone rings . . .)

"Hello . . .this is the school nurse (muffled giggle). I'm calling because your son has just come in. Evidently he twisted his knee, and I'm calling to ask permission to administer ice and pain reliever."

(Me . . . worried) "Oh my, is he ok?!"

(Nurse) "I believe so . . . it was kind of comical (Comical?!?!). He said he twisted his knee in the boys' bathroom when he slipped. I asked him if he slipped on water, and he said "I sure HOPE so!"

(Nurse and I both laughing)

Crazy kid.

Ante up

(breathlessly getting into the car after a rather trying trip to the grocery store with me and his sister, addressing her from the backseat) OK. Stop talking and listen to me. (holding up a dollar bill) I will give you a DOLLAR if you can be QUIET for 1 whole minute. No talking, no sounds, no nothing. Starting . . . (intently looking at the clock) . . . NOW!

Her, responding enthusiastically, big smile on her face: Wow! That's going to be hard to do! I don't know if I can BE quiet for a whole minute. That's like 60 whole seconds, but I guess it's worth a dollar, that's more than a penny a second . . .

Him, deadpan expression on his face, putting the dollar back in his pocket and catching my eye in the rearview mirror as she continues to chatter away: Are you KIDDING me?!